Little things had a tendency to overwhelm me, but today I actually smiled about them, found joy in accomplishing them and looked forward to tomorrow.
I have mentioned all ready that I am heading out for vacation in a couple days. Normally, this would completely send me off the deep end. I would wake up in the middle of the night in a sweat and just drink heavier during the day because of all the things I felt I had to get done before I left. This time, I still had a big list of things to do but as Friday afternoon wore on I was plowing through and getting things done. Then after I talked to the 3 folks that were joining me at my house tomorrow, they told me they were hoping I didn’t mind if they showed up in the afternoon. WOW! That is an extra 6 hours in my back pocket that I didn’t plan on! And with a clear head and no booze on my breath, I felt excited for the first time in a long time about getting out of town.
Tomorrow morning I am going to my usual morning meeting. Today, I touched base with a friend who’s number I have and explained that I was going on vacation and I might need a little boost during the week. Well, she lit up like a roman candle, excited that I would ask her for support and she gave me a big hug. She said, “I may call and just to touch base so I can hear your voice!” Here I was worried about asking her and she made me feel like I did her the favor!
I also got out my AA schedule for the area and found meetings to go to, so even though my friends that are going with me aren’t AA’s, you would barely call them drinkers. One doesn’t drink at all and the others may have one glass of wine…maybe. I also have my get-away car so there will be no worries trying to get to a meeting when I want to. I am feeling pretty comfortable about the situation but trying to be prepared.
Where we are going, we will be lucky to find internet, so I may have some withdrawals without my broadband. Anyone that reads this blog you may miss me for a couple of days but please leave me a note and let me know how you are doing. If I get a chance to write an entry or two, I will and I am bringing my notebook and will journal my thoughts. Doing this blog helps me sort out things, hardly Pulitzer material it is just part of my recovery tools. Your comments and feedback is definitely helpful and appreciated.
Learning to Meditate
Since I will be at the shore (or where we are from we call it “the coast”), my options and opportunities are different than from when I am home. I thought it may be a good idea to try and learn how to meditate. I know many people that do meditate but I honestly can say I have no idea how to do it. I bought a couple books, read one and have another one in process. I am bringing a mat and hope to find a good place on the ledges next to the ocean to give it a try. Meditation sounds like a handy tool to help me with the anxieties without drugs or alcohol and God knows I need alternatives to alcohol.
Today was a good day. No alcohol. One more day to cross off. Thank you all and thank you God. Tomorrow is a new day and I am looking forward to it.