Recovery is a process and for those that are “in the process” know that. I had heard that before but really didn’t know what it meant. I guess I really didn’t know what “Life Change” was either. I am a person that has to “walk the walk” for a while before it sinks in.
One Day At A Time?
When I first started going to AA, One Day At A Time meant to me, no drinking, “One Day At A Time.” I could deal with the thought. 24 hours. Though some times life served up a “fat pitch” and just getting through a few hours that led up to the ONE DAY was hard. But I have done it…so far. I just kept going to meetings.
Feeling Like Sh&T In a New Way
So now I am starting to see the whole “Life Change” thing. And with “Life Changes” and for me, there comes some real brain struggles and then pain. Tears even. I was talking to a friend of mine today and out of nowhere I started crying. We were not even talking about my recovery and it just came out. She is not in the program but is very spiritual and grounded, my take on it is, I feel safe around her and I can let my guard down? Now that the shakes, guilt and cravings have passed, I have a new thing to struggle with? That is just “SUPER!” (*sarcasm filter*)
Life On Life’s Terms
I hate hearing that one. But I do know it is true. Listening to others around the room share, piss and moan is very helpful. That particular day, that particular share may not be an “AH HA!” moment but so often it has popped into my head a day or two (or a meeting or two) later.
How About Now?
I am sitting here, sipping tea and writing to you all and I know I am not alone. I wonder what tomorrow will bring, because now with sobriety, I have tomorrow.